Confused students report that the Office of Residential Life has started responding to all emails with a simple message of “Gone Fishing.” “I assumed that someone in the office would be able to answer my questions, but it seems not,” said freshman Alina Humm, expressing her dismay at ResLife’s two-word response to her inquiries. “The only other thing in the email was a shitty GIF of a dancing fish wearing a hat. I’m not sure where the ResLife staff have gone off to, but I hope they open up shop again soon.” Additional reports indicate that ResLife has affixed a sign to their office door that says “Closed for the Season.”

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