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The Brown Noser

Romance Writer Clearly Obsessed With Loins

Published Friday, September 17th, 2021

According to recent reviews, regionally-renowned romance novelist Scarlet Greenblossom is clearly obsessed with loins.

“Though her plots vary, the one constant across all of Greenblossom’s stories is loins,” noted Cheryl Wilkerson, a fan of the author’s work. “Her characters always have loins, and they’re always quivering.”

“Sometimes Greenblossom mentions loins in scenes where they just don’t seem to be relevant,” commented Wilkerson, citing a detailed description of a dark forest that takes a sudden turn into loin imagery in one of Greenblossom’s recent novels. “Clearly, she’s more than a little obsessed.”

“I’m not sure that she even knows where loins are,” Wilkerson continued, counting a dozen mentions of the word across a single page. “Whatever the case, you truly can’t avoid them if you happen to read one of her books.”

At press time, Greenblossom had fallen in love with the word “svelte.”

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