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The Brown Noser

Sophisticated Woman Feeds Pigeons Tiny Baguettes

Published Friday, March 8th, 2019

A sophisticated woman was spotted feeding pigeons tiny baguettes instead of bread crumbs at India Point Park on Sunday. “She looked like a typical park-goer from a distance,” said area woman Michelle Zane after witnessing the fancy lady sprinkling miniature French loaves across the sidewalk. “But when I got closer, I realized she was feeding the pigeons hundreds of tiny baguettes. She had a paper bag full of them. They were all freshly-baked and pristine—the pinnacle of sophistication.” At press time, the woman was offering the pigeons miniature glasses of chardonnay.

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