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Recent reports from the restaurant sector indicate that a local steakhouse is so mahogany.
“When that rich shade of brown hits your eyes, you can’t help but know you’ve entered Ron’s Big Steaks,” said Frank Kernel, longtime customer of Ron’s and a self-described “steakiac.” “It’s that particular brown that announces to you, ‘Hey buddy, unfurl your bib and take out those metal things we call utensils. You’re in for a steak-having time.’”
“I’ve been going to steakhouses since I was ten-and-a-half years old, and nowhere is as richly paneled with that damned tropical hardwood as Ron’s is,” continued Kernel, eyes glazed over and knees weak at the mere thought of a delicious ribeye from Ron’s. “I’ve never seen that much wood in one building. It’s like God compressed a whole forest into one room and then filled that room with beautiful, beautiful steak.”
At press time, a local aquarium was so cerulean.
