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The Brown Noser

Stressed Meteorologist Reports Region of High Pressure in Friendship With Kyle

Published Friday, April 20th, 2018

During a broadcast this past Wednesday, meteorologist Daniel Martin reported a region of high pressure in his relationship with Kyle.

“This week we are seeing a rising area of intense pressure between me and Kyle,” said Martin. “This pressure will likely break all existing records for the area unless he stops bothering me about my plans for the weekend.”

Martin first forecasted the region of high pressure when Kyle made an offhand comments suggesting Martin should spend less time with his girlfriend.

“This week we could see this region of high pressure spread into my relationship with my girlfriend,” said Martin. “That area of strain and immense stress could affect conditions in my own homelife.”

At press time, Martin was recommending a travel advisory to Kyle’s house.

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