Sources report that junior Sam Redmond, who is receiving the COVID-19 vaccine before many of his peers, has an underlying condition of wanting to go to Cancún really badly. “You hear a lot of scary stories about the people with preexisting conditions in these times,” Redmond explained, referring to his underlying condition of experiencing only in-country vacations this year. “Getting the vaccine will lift a weight off my shoulders. It’s really important that people who have been impacted harder than everyone else get access to the vaccine at an early stage. I, for example, haven’t had a margarita on an overcrowded beach in over a year.” At press time, Redmond was explaining his other underlying condition of bad vibes.

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