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The Brown Noser

Thanksgiving Dinner An Exciting Preview Of All The Family Drama Bound To Come Up At Christmas Next Month

Published Friday, November 4th, 2016

Providing just a quick refresher on all the interfamilial conflict that’s built up over the years, the Hoxie family’s Thanksgiving dinner served as an exciting preview of all the family drama that’s bound to come up at Christmas.

“We were together only for the afternoon so everyone was able to keep it together pretty well,” said the Hoxie family’s oldest grandchild, Allan. “Next month, everyone will have a much better opportunity to hash out their problems. Everyone stays at Nana’s house for two nights and it’s like a pressure cooker for family drama. If this Thanksgiving is any indication, we’re in for a wild Christmas.”

Over the course of Thanksgiving dinner, allusions were made to such contentious topics as how Uncle Max only comes to visit during the holidays, how Aunt Cheryl let her daughter get a tattoo, and even how Nana read Aunt Kathy’s teenage diary back in the ‘80s. Sources report that the closest any of this drama came to a confrontation was an anticlimactic eye roll accompanied by a muttered “not now.”

“I had totally forgotten that Mom had beef with Uncle Max until Mom made a dig about him during dessert,” reported Allan. “She’s still mad Uncle Max didn’t choose her to be his son’s godmother. But Uncle Max didn’t take the bait. He didn’t even respond to it. Next month, we’ll have a lot more time to unpack everything and I’m sure they’re gonna be at each other’s throats.”

At press time, everyone was channeling their frustrations into an argument over who’d have to take home leftovers.

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