Currently sitting cross-legged outside the theater of Alexander Hamilton High School, theater kid Jeremy Clifford is never not singing in harmony to whatever noise is happening around him.

Sources report that, whether he’s surrounded by a group of friends singing the harmony to “I Dreamed a Dream” from Les Miserables or sitting in an algebra test controlling his pitch to complement the quiet rustling of pencils on paper, Clifford exists in a constant state of singing a high-pitched tone that turns whatever sound is going on around him into a full major chord.

“I wonder if Robbie’s going to get cast as Danny in Grease,” said Clifford’s friend Alice Ruthersbaugh as Clifford matched every syllable with a perfect tone that emanated out of his peaceful, angelic face.

Clifford then pursed his lips and moved his hands up and down softly as he harmonized with a firetruck siren that drove by before continuing to harmonize with his friends’ conversation.

At press time, someone blew a dog whistle and Clifford exploded.

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