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I’ve heard a lot of chatter recently about this “American Sniper,” Chris Kyle. I don’t know much about him but, truth be told, I’ve got a bone to pick with this guy. Why? Well, I don’t think he has any right to be marketing himself like he has been, and that’s because there’s only one “American Sniper”: Kobe Bryant from behind the three-point line.
Have you seen this guy’s range? Accuracy? All-around talent? No one can shoot like Kobe. He plays on the ball like a center, passes like a point guard, and posts up like a forward. He can toss up a three from anywhere and make it. No problem. Sure, he’s past his prime, but at his best Kobe was the best to ever play the game.
Don’t believe me? Just look at this stat line: 32,000 points, 11,000 field goals, 1,500 3-pointers, 5 championships. No one will ever top that. Number 14 is the best sharpshooter of all time, and that’s a fact. I don’t care who you are: Michael Jordan, LeBron James, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Chris Kyle, whoever. Kobe’s leadership and talent make him the most dangerous player ever to take the court. And you can quote me on that.
I know Kobe never fought in a war, but think about if he had. He could throw mines with laser precision. Hand-eye coordination? Unmatched. Strength? Outstanding. This guy’s won more hard-fought battles than anyone I know. Meet Kobe on the battlefield and say goodbye. That’s what I think.
Now, I’m sure this Chris Kyle guy has done some good stuff—wait, what? He referred to all Iraqis as savages? He killed children and bragged about it? And he did all this during a totally unjustified invasion and criminal occupation which he didn’t see as being wrong in any way, shape, or form?
Wow. What a hate-filled, evil murderer. I rest my case.
