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According to sources close to the couple, area woman Jennifer Boyd has abandoned her boyfriend of six years, Josh Geckler, to elope with a saxophone riff. Duane, who is an incorporeal series of soul-massaging notes, cast a spell on Boyd when she first heard him at a wine tasting three weeks ago.
“Duane satisfies me in ways Josh never could,” said Boyd. “While Josh is a dark-haired 26-year-old of medium build, Duane is a brassy walk from middle to low register, with a splash of high F that culminates in a wail both plaintive and seductive. While Josh is a human, Duane is a brief musical composition.”
She added, “And that’s never gonna change.”
Friends and family report that Geckler wanted to spend the rest of his life with Boyd and was devastated by the break-up.
“Was I angry at Duane? Of course,” said Geckler, “I wanted to fight him. But I couldn’t, because he is a few bars of playful sax music and therefore lacks a corporeal form.”
Despite his frustration, Geckler admitted that he understands Boyd’s decision. “I get why Jen fell for him,” said Geckler. "From his opening boogie-woogie flutter, the guy just oozes sex appeal.”
Jennifer and Duane celebrated their new relationship with a steamy trip to Cabo San Lucas. “The best part was we only had to pay for one plane ticket," said Boyd. “Airlines don’t charge saxophone riffs for tickets.”
