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The Brown Noser

Young Bull Vows To Catch Piece of Red Fabric That Killed His Parents

Published Friday, September 22nd, 2023

A Young Bull named Buck has announced that he will stop at nothing to catch the dangling piece of red fabric that killed both his parents.

“If I see that motherfucker, I’m going after it. No questions asked,” said Buck, while sharpening his horns on a rock. “It’s not just any piece of red fabric. It’s the one that’s always being held by that fancily dressed Spanish man. I bet they’re friends or something. The man always dangles it around, but I don’t give a shit about that little shiny man. It’s the red fabric I want.”

“I watched that…thing. I watched it mercilessly attack my own mother,” said Buck, shuddering at the thought. “My father did everything he could, but…he was outmatched…But I won’t be. The next time I face that fucking piece of red fabric I’m gonna run at it so fast. There’s no way it’s getting away from me. It thinks it’s quick, but I’m quicker. I’m gonna run right past that tiny Spanish gentleman and gouge that fucking thing. You can bet on it.”

At press time, the Bull was seen dragging his front foot in the dirt before charging because it felt kind of itchy down there.

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