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The Brown Noser

Ask Jamie

Published Friday, April 24th, 2009

Dear James A Brew:

You're a valued Citizen's Bank customer, and our goal is to keep you informed of changes that may affect the way you bank with us. That's why we are writing to you today.

On Tuesday, April 28, 2009, at 6:00 p.m., our branch at 120 Waterman Street will close and consolidate with our branch at 8 Washington Street. Your accounts will be transferred automatically and you may begin banking there at any time.

There will be no changes to your accounts as a result of this move. We value your relationship and are working to make this an easy transition for you. We look forward to serving all your banking needs at the Washington Street branch. Thank you for banking with Citizens Bank.

-Bemused Branch Manager

Dear Bemused,

Dealing with change is difficult for everyone, and inevitably we form emotional ties with the world we know, the way things are right now. You might find it hard to let go of the Waterman Street branch you are so familiar with. And I think your insistence that no accounts will be changed may be a way of saying to yourself, "I don't want any change; I'm fine with my life as it is." And while that's perfectly fine to say, in situations like yours I always try to remind myself that change can be a good thing. If you can bring yourself to embrace the positive aspects of change then you will probably be happier in the long run.

To: Brew, James

Your mailbox has exceeded one or more size limits set by your administrator. Your mailbox size is 46839 KB.

Mailbox size limits:

You will receive a warning when your mailbox reaches 46080 KB.You may not be able to send or receive new mail until you reduce your mailbox size.

To make more space available, delete any items that you are no longer using or move them to your personal folder file (.pst). Items in all of your mailbox folders-including the Deleted Items and Sent Items folders-count against your size limit. You must empty the Deleted Items folder after deleting items or the space will not be freed. See client Help for more information.

-Stumped System Administrator

Dear Stumped,

It's easy to overreact to things like this, and I think the important thing for you is to keep things in perspective. Is it really necessary to impose so many limits on your life? Does the prospect of large mailboxes intimidate or unsettle you? It needn't; some people are actually very happy with mailboxes of over 100,000 KB. It's good, though, that you're open to the possibility of seeking client Help.

To: Brew, James
Your Service Request Number SR00184639 has been scheduled under Work Order Number Z62109.
Submitted BY: BREW,JAMES
Email: James_Brew@brown.edu
Phone:
Service Description: ANDREWHALL:LOCK NOT WORKING
Location information: Site: MAIN Building: 100103 Floor: 3 Room: 316
-Flummoxed Facilities Management

Dear Flummoxed,

There is a tendency I am seeing more and more in my readers to try to reduce everything to numbers, even personal problems. And although I'm sure this is often useful for organization, I also think we can easily get bogged down in the technicalities. For example, there aren't even close to 100,000 buildings on Brown's campus. Why use such a high number? And if you already know it's Room 316, it seems like you're complicating things too much by also listing the floor as 3. As a general rule, try to simplify your life as much as possible, and you'll do well for yourself.

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