Saying that he’ll definitely get around to it, Steve Diamond indicated that winning his wife back was four items down on his to-do list.
“Look, these days, you have to prioritize your time,” said Diamond, leafing through his list. “All these things are important—mowing the lawn, resolving years of festering emotional issues with my estranged wife Charlotte, getting my oil checked.
Take a look up at the night sky. A truly majestic sight, isn’t it? The twinkling stars, suspended in the darkness, reminding us of man’s impermanence and existential loneliness. There could definitely be more of them. There should be more stars.
Business records indicate that local mom and pop store Boxer’s Best earns 90 percent of their revenue in sales made entirely out of pity.
“The place was so empty when I went in that it was clear they had no business whatsoever," said customer Max Arnett.
Partly Cloudy, 64°
