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The Brown Noser

God Can't Fill Job-Sized Hole In Unemployed Man's Heart

Published Friday, April 24th, 2015

Sources report that despite having a close relationship with God, religion can’t fill the job-sized hole in area man Mark Adler’s heart.

“I’ve turned to God in times of trouble, but worship alone can’t suffice to make me happy anymore,” Adler said, adding that he has not felt the same comfort he used to feel from going to church after he lost his job. “God is great and so is religion. But I was laid off and I struggle to compete in a workforce that prefers skills that I don’t have, and that I can't to acquire because I didn’t grow up with money. God helps, but I would love a job.”

Adler’s spirituality had always pushed him to do good things and to spend time with his loved ones, but it hasn’t helped him to deal with the crushing despair that accompanies being treated as completely disposable by the economy. “I recognize that religion is more important than whatever job I have,” Adler said. “I’d just like to work, is all. Being unemployed is hard. I’m a hard worker and I’ve done nothing wrong.”

“There’s existential angst,” Adler added. “And then there are threats to your existence. I have God to help with the former, but I’m constantly at odds with American society to avoid the latter.”

Adler noted that no matter how much time he spends with family or with his prayer groups, he can't quell the anxiety he experiences because of his precarious economic position. “I feel empty.”

At press time, Adler hoped he could find an entry-level job somewhere so he could start feeling unfulfilled but in a different way.

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