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The Brown Noser

Senior In Need Of Groceries Decides It’s Time To Catch Up With That One Girl With Car

Published Friday, October 26th, 2018

Fervently digging through his contact list, senior David Minsk decided Wednesday that it was about time to catch up with that girl who has a car, and also time to get groceries.

“Moriah was in my unit freshman year,” Minsk said after peering into his empty fridge. “We talked a few times but, wow, it’s been awhile! I’m just gonna shoot her a text. I wonder what she’s been up to. I can’t wait to sit down, talk about senior year, and ask if she’s headed to Whole Foods anytime soon.”

“I’ve cleared my weekend for two things: grabbing coffee with Moriah, and stocking up on groceries," mentioned Minsk, as he considered his barren pantry. "I’m excited to chat with an old friend who happens to have a car, and after that make a trip to the grocery store, ideally in that same car.”

At press time, Minsk was practicing the phrase “Wait, you have a car, right?” over and over in the mirror.

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