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Elon Musk, founder and CEO of SpaceX, announced Monday that he hopes his company will be the first to send rich people into space and allow them to be killed there.
“I fully intend to send wealthy elites into space where they will be the first human beings to perish there in a fiery crash,” Musk said in a prepared statement, adding that he will personally ensure that a group of moneyed Americans die in space in this century with or without federal approval. “The world has always looked to its most fortunate men and women to push the boundaries of what can and can’t be done. ”
The SpaceX ship will carry passengers into Earth’s exosphere, enabling them to experience a micro-gravitational environment. “We’re very excited about the possibilities of private spaceflight,” Musk said. “My engineers tell me that it will take another five years for the craft to be ready, but I’m sure we’ll make a successful round trip in two years. At that rate, we should have a group of rich, dead space travelers by 2016."
SpaceX chief engineer Toby Malthus expressed support for Branson’s decision. “I look forward to our first test run,” Malthus said. “Assuming all goes well in the experimental phase, we’ll have lulled enough government officials into a false sense of security so that the tragic death of several hundred rich people will be all but inevitable.”
Musk also spoke enthusiastically about SpaceX’s newest project. “Our next goal is to put a group of rich people on Mars,” Musk said. “There we will start a colony. No one will die there, because on Mars no one can die. People can only die on and around Earth. This is a new idea that I just posited but which I will prove when we send rich people to Mars. Keep your TVs tuned to channel SpaceX!”
