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The Brown Noser

Terrifying Barista Keeps Writing “You Will Die Tonight” In Latte Foam

Published Friday, April 20th, 2018

Blue State customers report that a new terrifying barista has been writing “You Will Die Tonight” in foam on top of their lattes.

“When I look down at my latte and the barista has drawn a nice heart or leaf in the foam, it’s a little treat,” said customer Hannah Gates. “But the new barista wrote that I was going to die tonight and I felt a sudden chill all over my body. I couldn’t shake it all day.”

Sources report that the scary barista has been dispensing dark prophecies about customer’s futures in all customer’s latte foam.

“She wrote ‘Beware The Wolf Man. He Will Ruin You’ in mine,” said customer Daniella Martinez. “I am scared.”

According to Blue State patrons, other prophecies included “Run For Your Life!,” “Don’t Let The Night Fall,” and “The Reaper Is Looking For You. He WILL Be Satisfied.”

“Mine came true,” said Dylan Marshall, who had been handed a latte that read ‘Your Friends Will Not Escape The Woods.’ “My buddies went to their house by the lake a few days ago. They’ve been missing ever since.”

“I keep coming back,” said Sam Masterson. “She keeps writing ‘The Dark Prince Will Own Your Soul’ in mine. It creeps me out, but her lattes are the best.”

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