Reports indicate that modern musical Against the World features an anachronistic lack of misogyny despite being set in the 1950s. “I mean, at one point in the show the female lead made a decision,” audience member Laura Allens remarked, also perplexed at her lack of cooking ability.
According to local sources, 17-year-old Devon McKinley’s Top Gun-Inspired mustache is starting to look more like it was inspired by that guy from the gas station. “I knew it was a mistake to take him to that movie,” said his mother, Christina, watching Devon trim the ends of his patchy, spindly mustache.
According to sources, area man Josh Gruff thinks a movie would be better if the dog talked.
“I don’t know, there was just something missing,” said Gruff following a viewing of the heart-wrenching new film about abject poverty Triste Pauvreté.
Sources report that a shitty cartoon desert doesn’t have a lone skull placed in its foreground. “I don’t know how I’m supposed to understand that this desert is a barren, desolate place without an animal skull mixed in with the cacti,” said viewer of the cartoon Murphy Milligan, wondering if the setting depicted was just a sandy parking lot in Las Vegas.
A trailer for HBO Max’s upcoming season of “The White Lotus” confirms rumors that the new season will take place where Brown University students vacationed over break.
“This new season is going to give audiences a glance into the comforts and calamities of the ultra-rich,” explained Mike White, creator of the show, peering over the sea of Brown University baseball caps while on location.
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