Tuesday, May 14, 2024
Partly Cloudy icon Partly Cloudy, 64°

The Brown Noser

Whitney Lewis

Writer (Retired)

Whitney's articles

New Study Links "Natty Ice" with Impotence; Civilization Doomed | Feb 25 2008

The results of a new study published Friday in Men's Health links popular beer Natural Ice with an array of sexual dysfunctions, including premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction. The 10-year study, conducted by the Ned Orbach Center for United Medicine, chronicles the sexual dysfunction and subsequent social humiliation suffered by a group of self-proclaimed "hard partying bros" from the Dartmouth chapter of Theta Delta Chi fraternity.

RISD Student Mistaken for Homeless Drifter, Classmates Ripe with Jealousy | Feb 25 2008

Providence Police responded to a public disturbance call last Thursday night at 11:40 pm from a local complaining that "shouting and shenanigans" were disrupting his sleep. When police arrived on scene, they found a disheveled man with full facial hair, and what appeared to be many layers of tattered clothing, yelling wildly and attempting to strike another man with a shopping cart full of books and loose papers.