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The Brown Noser

Arts & Culture (Mar 14 2025 issue)

Kanye West Might Be Headed Down The Wrong Path | Mar 14 2025

According to close friends and followers of Kanye West, the rapper could possibly be going down the wrong path. “Yeah, he’s kinda acting a bit weird lately,” said his girlfriend Bianca Censori, folding his new swastika t-shirt and putting it in his top dresser drawer.

Dumb Friend Really Thought Colonel Mustard Committed The Murder In The Billiard Room With The Wrench | Mar 14 2025

Your dumb friend lost a game of Clue by foolishly guessing Colonel Mustard committed the murder in the Billiard Room with the wrench. “You’re actually so dumb,” called out Jordan Hull to his friend who hadn’t thought to utilize a matrix system to record information and make key logical deductions throughout the game.

Hyper-Specific Word Problem Clearly Direct Attack On Student | Mar 14 2025

Sources from Professor Jessie Berridge’s Public Economics class have revealed that their latest midterm contained a hyper-specific word problem that was clearly an attack on a student. “Jon C. is always raising their hand during class and wasting everyone’s time,” stated the word problem just days after a student, Jonathan Carnash, asked a question four times in one class.

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