Priya's articles
Sources report that the seven mattress stores in extremely close proximity to one another are certainly not a cover for the laundering of drug money.
Various employees and managers vehemently denied to reporters that their stores were fronts for drug sales despite having few mattresses, no financial records documenting mattress purchases from wholesale retailers and periodic visits from individuals seeking out things like “a gram for 50 just like last time.”
“Yeah, the guys coming in are just looking for mattress springs.
Saying that it seems awfully fishy, President Barack Obama told reporters that the giant wooden horse left in front of the white house might signify something bad.
“It’s definitely out of the ordinary, and in these strange times, this giant horse should be looked at with some degree of suspicion,” Obama said, adding that its large size and indefinite origins are also cause for concern.
Saying that even a small-time drug deal would be fun, Southside Diner owner Jim Capelli admitted that he was kind of disappointed in the lack of deals that have gone down in the corner booth of his establishment. “Business is good, but by now I’d hoped to at least see a few guys say they understand each other perfectly back there,” said Capelli, who opened the diner in 2011.
It is so hard to raise strong, confident girls in this country. You have to constantly make sure they aren’t poisoned by the media and forced to conform to society’s ridiculous standards of beauty. I see my own daughter grappling every day with the pressure to conform to one specific body image, namely the rotund, four-armed, proboscidate illustration of the Hindu god, Ganesh.
According to the National Institutes of Health, an infectious disease that scientists would like to avoid thinking about, let alone naming, is way too gross to cure. “The NIH actually doesn’t fund research for diseases that are this gross, icky, disgusting, or unpleasant,” said researcher Neil Dwyer, adding that the symptoms of the disease were far grosser than anything he was qualified to cure.
According to a new report from the Urban Policy Institute, there is a staggeringly unequal distribution of Korean War memorabilia amongst Americans.
Economist Leanne Miller’s findings showed that over 99 percent of Korean War memorabilia is owned by just 1 percent of the nation’s population.
As the semester progresses, many students are feeling the stress of juggling work and social lives at Brown. One student in particular, Jacob Hogan ‘17, is staying in this Friday to get some work done on his mysterious loner personality.
Hogan admitted that he is a “little overwhelmed” at how difficult college can be when it comes to things like schoolwork, classes, and convincing other people that he is a strong and solitary enigma of a human being.
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