Partly Cloudy, 64°
Despite Jane Conrad's '14 demanding work schedule, Sandra Walters '14 says her friend is always excited to hear about her relationship. Even during the past two months, while Walters and her boyfriend have gone through periods of turmoil, Conrad has always been there to remove a noise-cancelling headphone, scowl, and lend an ear.
"Honestly, Jane is the best friend and roommate I could have asked for. She always wants to know when my boyfriend and I are fighting, or when we don't talk to each other for a few hours, or when he cheats on me," stated Walters, smiling a wide, toothy grin, "the last time that happened Jane was basically on her knees begging me to tell her about it."
"Even at four in the morning!" she added.
According to Walters, Conrad is very vocal about staying up-to-date regarding her romantic issues, and often shows her interest by hiding under her bed on her knees while suppressing her breathing. Walters affirmed that her roommate, who has employed such methods as blasting death-metal music, dividing the room in half with caution tape, and playing dead, is constantly baiting her for romantic details.
"I remember when my boyfriend decided to break up with me on Facebook without talking to me about it first," Walters said, her eyes widening. "I knew Jane would want to know about it right away, so I marched right over to the room where her class was being held and told her everything."
Walters praised Conrad for never interrupting, always taking her time to respond, and only occasionally attacking her with mechanical pencils, despite her thirst for information. In addition, she was flattered that Conrad's interest was taking such intense forms as barricading their dorm room door with furniture, or hoarding food and welding said door shut for days.
In addition, Walters was flattered that her roommate was so fascinated by her relationship, no matter the time or place.
"When my boyfriend didn't respond to my text over winter break, I just thought that Jane would be so mad at me if I didn't tell her," stated Walters, whose forehead now revealed a pulsing vein. "I called her cell phone, and no one answered. And that's when it hit me - Jane was clearly busy, so I hung up and called her house phone instead."
"Luckily her mother picked up so I told her everything. Mrs. Conrad was so sweet about it and agreed to relay the message - on the condition that Jane stopped crying, of course," she added.
According to Walters, Conrad has been intrigued with her life far beyond the scope of her relationship troubles. She claims that even before her romance began, her family, her homework, and her toe fungus have fascinated Conrad, who showed interest by repeatedly contacting a man with a low voice and begging for "a favor." Walters, however, admitted that she is beginning to find Conrad's intrigue to be quite a time commitment.
"During presidents day weekend, my boyfriend changed his desktop background from a picture of me to a sunset, and I was a total wreck. I knew Jane would kill me if I didn't tell her, but she had already gone home. That's when I realized - what am I going to do this summer? It's going to be so hard to keep her updated while we live on opposite sides of the country. I might have to change my internship plans and go live with her instead." Walters said.
She added, concluding, "Oh my God, I just remembered. I have to call Jane, I bet she's dying to know how this interview is going."
