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The Brown Noser

A Cappella Group Initiates New Members With Cute Little Blood Pact

Published Friday, September 13th, 2019

Gathering their new recruits in a circle, a cappella group The PemBlokes initiated their 4 new members this past weekend with an adorable little blood pact.

“This is just a cute little thing we do to make the new guys feel special,” president Carl Stroop said while polishing a ceremonial knife. “We kidnap them from their dorms, take them to this remote field, have them chant for a while, and wrap up by slitting their palms and having them sign a document in blood that binds them to this group and each other forever until they die. It’s pretty routine. All the groups have their little quirks, and ours is this totally random blood pact thing.”

Etching mysterious runes in the dirt with the toe of his boot and dispersing lighter fluid in a geometric pattern, Stroop continued to explain the absolutely charming ceremony that marks new members’ entrance into the group.

“After the little blood pact ritual thing, we have them repeat some words that bind their spirits to the collective group soul. There’s some fire breathing, a little seance to contact the founders of the group. Then we fix them up with some darling little bandages so they don’t bleed everywhere and take them back to their dorms! Everyone should be back in their beds by 1 AM at the latest. The whole blood pact thing really tuckers us out.”

“I heard The Ursa Minors have everyone do karaoke at initiation, so I guess this is our twist on that!”

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