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The Brown Noser

Apple Maps Route Rendered Useless To Man With No Idea Which Direction He’s Facing

Published Friday, September 16th, 2016

Spinning around in an effort to orient himself, local man Joey Grigg’s Apple Maps route was reportedly rendered useless due to the fact that Grigg’s had no idea which way he was facing.

Despite his prolonged efforts to figure out which direction was which by looking at the buildings around him and then attempting to locate them on his Apple map, Griggs was unable to figure out which way he was supposed to go in order to get to his acupuncture appointment on time. Sources close to Griggs reported that he had been talking about how excited he was for his first appointment with a new acupuncturist all week, and had said he was ‘pretty sure’ he knew right where the office was.

Griggs reportedly attempted walking 20 feet then looking at the map to see if the blue dot representing him had moved, but was still unable to figure out which direction he was headed. Passerby Mark Evans stated, “I watched him go back and forth across the same street three times. It was sort of sad because he was clearly trying to be nonchalant about it. Every time he turned around he said ‘oh!’ like he had finally figured out where he was supposed to be walking.”

Witnesses report that Griggs ultimately remained in the same spot for upwards of thirty minutes opening and closing his maps app to see if that would somehow solve the problem, while he mumbled about how a circle was the most unhelpful shape that could be used to represent a human being who was lost.

At press time, Griggs was seen wiping away frustrated tears and asking a nice policeman for help.

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