Partly Cloudy, 64°
Saying that you should “go ahead and grab those kettle bells now,” your new at-home workout DVD is apparently assuming you have those weird weight balls just lying around your home. “It’s time to work that upper body,” said the woman leading the workout, seemingly under the impression that your living room is completely stocked with gym equipment. Sources confirmed that, Christ, you can’t just mention kettle bells 20 minutes into the DVD. Sources added that it’s called “Beginner’s Fat Blast,” for God’s sake. “You can use any weight kettle bell. Don’t worry about using the heaviest ones,” said the woman who must think that kettle bells are a common household object without which no home is complete. The DVD went on to tell viewers to keep things interesting by adding kettle bells to other exercises, which sure is funny because the relatively obscure equipment was not mentioned earlier in the video, forcing you to just pretend you had kettle bells in your hands like some kind of stupid body-building mime. At press time, the DVD had the audacity to tell you that you were doing a great job.
