Reports from Brenda Ditty ’24 indicate that all the articles on The Brown Daily Herald’s Opinions page have really given her tons to not think about. “Wow, I never really thought about how Providence should put more crosswalks near public swimming pools! And I never will again!” said Ditty, perusing her peers’ thoughtful takes on everything from the importance of implementing more designated yodeling spaces on campus to impassioned pleas for everyone to boycott the internet. “This is truly some groundbreaking stuff. For example, I never knew how much I didn’t want to read this kind of thing, but now I do. And for that, I’m grateful.” At press time, the College Hill Independent inspired students to never look up what ‘ekphrasis’ means.

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