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The Brown Noser

Comedian Spends Entire Set Taking Tiny, Nervous Sips of Water

Published Friday, October 26th, 2018

During a local open mic night, amauteur comedian Jo Bartles spent his entire set taking tiny, nervous sips of water. Although Bartles carefully positioned a glass of water on the stool next to him when he took the stage, audience members had no idea that this would be the peak of his 5-minute set.

“He started his set by clearing his throat purposefully, which was promising," recalled audience member Sheryl Trobee. "But then he pivoted towards that glass like he hadn’t seen water in weeks. And as soon as he turned back to the mic he held up a finger and went in for another sip. And another. And another.”

“He didn’t say a word the whole time,” continued Trobee. “He just shuffled back and forth sipping from that glass of water, the tiniest sips possible. There were a couples times when he opened his mouth to say something, but immediately coughed and went back to the water. By the end of the set, his palms were so sweaty that the glass nearly slipped right out!"

At press time, Bartles was gearing up for a new set that’s five minutes of flipping through his notes.

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