Partly Cloudy, 64°
After spending some time with your crab-like friend, it became apparent that he was rather soft on the inside once you looked beyond his hardened exterior.
“Devin is known to be pretty reserved. But if you’re a close friend of his, he’ll really come out of his shell,” said Devin’s friend Colleen, unable to resist the allure of Devin’s one noticeably larger hand which he frequently uses to attract mates. “He puts on this tough facade, but on the inside, he’s a gentle soul.”
“Did two tours in Afghanistan. I’ve seen some things,” sighed Devin, pacing sideways and clicking his fingers together. “Some of my friends keep saying I’m a softie on the inside. Yeah, right—they’re just messing with me. If you saw what the Taliban was doing in Kabul back in the 2010s, you would be pretty stoic and desensitized too.”
At press time, Devin was snacking on some seafloor detritus.
