Reports from nearby the kitchen sink suggest that area dad Bill Henderson is clearly in love with the plumber. “Geez, these two need to get a room for cryin’ out loud,” reported Henderson’s son Jackson, watching his obviously smitten father gape at the plumber’s every move as if filled with undying infatuation. “Dad won’t stop asking the poor guy stuff like ‘What’s that you got there?’ and ‘What’re you doing now?’ and ‘What kind of wrench you using?’ He can’t even let the man take a breath without cracking some stupid joke. Obsessed much?” At press time, Jackson’s mom clearly had some sort of nemesis situation going on with the know-it-all contractor.

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