Thursday, December 26, 2024
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The Brown Noser

Elephants Are So Heavy They Would Definitely Pop A Big Ball If They Tried To Balance On One by Guy Who Has Never Been To The Circus

Published Friday, February 16th, 2024

There aren’t a ton of things that I’m sure about. Death and taxes I guess. Also the fact that, since elephants are so big and heavy, they would deeeefinitely pop a big ball if they tried to balance on it. I’m super sure about that. I’m also sure that I’m terrified of clowns and motorcycles driving through big flaming hoops. Back to my point though. I’m absolutely convinced that if you put one of those big gray suckers on a huge red ball and made it walk forwards and backwards or perhaps stand on one foot while hoisting a nimble acrobat who is also performing some sort of feat of balance and flexibility, they’d totally just pop the ball. No way would that work. I really don’t have any doubts about this one. But still I can’t shake the nagging desire to know once and for all. I wish there was a place I could go put this question to rest. Welp. I guess I’ll never know for sure. One thing I do know for sure: how much I absolutely hate when pairs of industrious young brothers go into show business together. I can’t stand that. Or when a fearsome wild animal learns how to use an impractical method of transportation. I just really hate that and I’ve worked hard to never be in a situation where I’d be subjected to those things. I’m rambling again aren’t I? Let me get back to my original point. Without a shadow of a doubt, I can say with 100% certainty that if a big huge elephant were to stand on a flimsy little ball, or even a flimsy big one for that matter, it would absolutely pop because the elephant is so heavy. It’s nice that some things aren’t up for debate.

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