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The Brown Noser

Everyone At Grand Canyon Has Mouth Open In Awe

Published Friday, September 16th, 2016

Sources at the Grand Canyon report that every tourist’s mouth is agape. Most visitors were unavailable for comment due to their mouths being wide open.

“Ahh,” said Matt Irvine, father of three visiting the natural wonder for the first time with his children. “It’s ahh… ahh… mazing.” Irvine’s children were unable to comment at all.

Although rendered incapable of speech, people could be seen taking pictures of the sight. Unfortunately many got drool all over their cameras because their mouths had been open for so long.

“This happens very single day,” Park Ranger Katie Dylan said, shaking her head in disgust. “I guess I can’t blame them. It took me three years after I started working here to close my mouth. You can’t beat nature."

At press time, hypnotized visitors could be seen shuffling into the gift shop to buy Grand Canyon themed souvenirs.

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