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The Brown Noser

Everyone In Spanish Textbook Wearing Solid-Colored T-Shirts

Published Friday, October 25th, 2019

Students in Hope High School’s intro Spanish course have reported that every single person pictured in their textbook is wearing a solid-colored T-shirt.

“There’s not a single person in this book who isn’t wearing a sturdy T-shirt in a primary or secondary color,” student Nellie Diman observed, gesturing to a page-spanning spread of friends in a cafe. “Whether they’re talking on the phone, at a soccer game, or learning how to tango, the people in this book wear nothing besides ill-fitting T-shirts in a handful of generic hues.”

Flipping through page after page of teenagers in bland outfits, Diman verified that there wasn’t a single stripe, polka dot, or logo present on the models’ shirts.

“I thought this one guy was wearing a gradient T-shirt for a second,” she said. “But it turns out it was just a shadow. The most exciting shirt I’ve seen in this book so far is a pink one. Just plain pink. Not even hot pink, just a very faint blush color.”

At press time, Diman added that everyone in the book was also wearing really uncomfortable-looking khaki pants.

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