Sara Myers, a horse girl, has scheduled her own euthanization after spraining her ankle. “Sara, like other horse girls, has very delicate legs compared to her upper body. Unfortunately, that means a sprained ankle is often a death sentence,” Sara’s doctor stated solemnly, gesturing toward an anatomical diagram of a horse girl. “Having Sara simply lay down isn’t a solution because during the long healing process, she would lose most of the muscle mass in her legs.”
“Horse girls are such strong, majestic creatures,” sighed Sara’s doctor as he administered a small dose of ketamine to calm Sara down. “And yet, it’s like they’re made of glass. This fragility really reminds you of the harsh reality of life.” At press time, a cat lady was licking herself in the hospital waiting room.

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