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According to recent reports, this humongous chair is certainly big, but not nearly large enough for a gargantuan ass.
“When I first tried to sit on this huge chair, I thought that for sure I would be able to sit down, but for some reason I couldn’t seem to fit!” exclaimed Gunter Peters, whose heaping rump seemed to have its own gravitational pull. “I mean, this chair is absolutely tremendous, I’m confident that it could accommodate me. But for some reason, whenever I try to sit down, the chair begins to crack and buckle beneath me.”
“It is so clear to me that it is Gunter’s absolutely mountainous ass that is preventing him from sitting on that large chair,” commented bystander Annelie Dawson, who could barely fit into the room due to Peters’s absolute dump truck. “Yes, the chair is immense, but Gunter’s butt is clearly more massive, it’s like 80% of his body weight!”
“Okay, maybe my ass is a little big,” Peters later admitted after falling backward on his ass and being unable to get back up. “I guess I do sometimes struggle to fit through doors or put on pants.”
At press time, Peters’s achievements were great, but not quite impressive enough for his father’s titanic expectations.
