Partly Cloudy, 64°
According to various scientific hypotheses, it’s so dark right now because I closed my eyes.
“It’s probably so pitch-black right now because your eyes are closed,” read a recent report by The American Journal of Physics. “If it’s so dark that you can’t even see a thing, it might be a result of your eyes being shut.”
“According to several data points, the reason everything is dark right now is your eyelids being closed,” the report continued as darkness continued to surround me after I closed my eyes. “As you’re blindly feeling your way around the room looking for a light switch, remember that it’s dark at this moment because your eyes are closed.”
At press time, it’s so quiet right now because I covered my ears.
