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After a hard-fought and incredibly sticky battle, the leader of a local polycule has been dethroned by a younger, hornier challenger.
“You fought well, but not well enough,” said Pyra Lindhorst, standing over the defeated and drained former champion of the polyamorous collective. “Your reign of terror and bad sex is at its end. Now, I will rebuild our great nation and reach even higher climaxes than you could ever achieve.”
“Our romantic commune has become weak and frighteningly celibate under the previous regime,” continued Lindhorst, turning to address the crowd of stunned lovers and freaks. “Under my leadership and guidance, however, we shall all enter a period of boundless love and sex with each other.”
“But it starts with you. We must all choose to take inappropriate action to ensure the suck-sex of us as a whole,” orated Lindhorst. “Turn to look at the person to your left, now look to your right. Now kiss both of them, and then make sure they kiss each other.”
At press time, Pyra had reformed the polycule into the most polyamorous form of governance of all: democracy.
