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The Brown Noser

Literary Arts Department Caps Intro Fiction Class At Zero Students

Published Friday, December 7th, 2018

In a push to keep class sizes small, the Literary Arts department announced it would cap its introductory fiction class for the Spring semester at zero students.

“In years past, we’ve found that some students’ voices can get buried even in classes with as few as 17 spots,” said Jasmine Zabrowski, head of the Literary Arts department. “To make sure our advising structures aren’t strained, we’ve decided to offer no spots at all in our popular intro to fiction class.”

Zabrowski added that students interested in taking Fiction I next semester should submit writing samples and come to class on the first day of shopping period to be put on a waitlist.

“After that, no student will be taken off the waitlist, and all the writing samples will be thrown away,” explained Zabrowski. “Also, by offering no spots at all in Fiction I, we can ensure that everyone is equally unable to take classes in our department.”

At press time, the Literary Arts department was exploring the possibility of offering zero classes next semester.

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