According to high school boys in romantic comedies, smart girl Anna Lyra would be really pretty if she just took off all her clothes.
“She could be a real hottie, but I don’t think she knows it,” said 16-year-old Tom Edgar as Lyra pushed her glasses up her nose and tightened her ponytail. “All she has to do is let down that hair and take off all of her clothes. I mean, jeez, if she just got completely naked, she might even have a shot at winning prom queen.”
Lyra has reportedly always been an ugly nerd on the fringes of the fictional high school’s social scene, tripping in the cafeteria and spending study hall in the chemistry lab instead of smoking on the front steps. It’s recently become clear, though, that Lyra would actually be really hot if she just chilled out a little and stripped.
“I can tell that, underneath all those clothes, she’s beautiful,” Edgar said while Lyra buttoned her cardigan up to her neck. “Everyone makes fun of her because she’s a total nerd with all those clothes on, but if she just took them off, she would be gorgeous. Hell, she could even be popular.”
“Anna should let people see the real her—the Anna underneath her clothes,” Edgar continued as Lyra dropped a stack of textbooks on the ground outside her locker. “She hides who she really is because she’s afraid everyone will judge her. But they won’t because they’ll finally be able to see Anna the way I see her: naked and therefore hot.”
At press time, Lyra and Edgar started fake-dating to make their exes jealous.

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