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The Brown Noser

Nitro Cart Employees Admit They Want To Drive It Around Like A Little Clown Car

Published Friday, October 26th, 2018

Wistfully staring at their pint-sized workplace, employees of the Nitro Cart admitted that they want to drive it around like a little clown car. Although the popular coffee stop is beloved by students for its rich, frothy brew, it’s more notorious to employees as a potential mode of novelty transportation.

“It’s so small and I wonder how silly I would look rolling down the streets in this thing," mused barista Kent West, as he thought about the perfectly tiny cart parked on George Street. "It’s just big enough to fit a person, but not so big that we’d look like normal people. We’d look like clowns. Sure, we serve great coffee, but this could be a more hysterical way of getting around the city. Plus, parking is so tough on College Hill.”

West clarified that his colleagues share the impulse.

“My buddy works the cart on Waterman and we talk about it all the time," continued West. "It would be hilarious if we all got in at once. And if I had one of those twisty horns and I could honk and wave at people. We could even throw pies at passersby! Securing a spot in a local parade is the dream, but in the meantime we’d be thrilled to just take it for a spin down Thayer.”

At press time, West was taping streamers to the back of the cart.

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