Tuesday, October 19, 2021
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The Brown Noser

Nostalgic Ratty Visit Cut Short After Senior Remembers It The Ratty

Published Friday, September 17th, 2021

Sources report that senior Trish Gonzales decided to cut short her nostalgic visit to the Ratty after remembering that, after all, it’s the Ratty.

“I’ve been talking about revisiting the Ratty for months now,” Gonzales said after spending eighteen dollars only to leave five minutes later. “I was so excited about reliving the days of all-you-can-eat dining. When I got here, though, it was clear that the only options were dishes prepared by the Ratty, which was super disappointing.”

Gonzales is one of a host of seniors flocking to the Ratty for the nostalgia only to realize that it’s still the same grimy eatery they complained about for years.

“I was ready to fill up my plate with all the Ratty classics: squash, grilled chicken, maybe a cone of soft serve afterwards,” said Gonzales, scraping heaps of disappointing vegetables into the compost bin. “Once I stepped into the food line I immediately remembered that I actually prefer almost any other establishment.”

At press time, Gonzales cut short her stay at the V-Dub after every napkin succumbed to the sticky tables.

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