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The Brown Noser

Obama Grounds Malia For Wrecking Air Force One

Published Friday, March 11th, 2016

President Barack Obama has reportedly grounded his daughter, Malia, for two weeks after he discovered a destroyed Air Force One on the White House lawn. “God damn it,” Obama said while on hold with AAA. “I told her that I didn’t want her piloting that thing after 9 p.m., but she didn’t listen. Now I have this fiery wreck on my hands. There’s shrapnel from here to the Pentagon for Christ’s sake! I can’t believe it. She’s going to have to pay for this out of her own pocket, y’know.” As of press time, Obama was making Malia walk door-to-door and apologize for waking up the neighbors.

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