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The Brown Noser

Report: Greg Eats Same Thing For Lunch Every Day

Published Friday, November 4th, 2016

According to a report put out by several of his co-workers, local man Greg Stavig eats the exact same thing for lunch every day. “It’s a turkey sandwich on whole wheat bread, lettuce, tomato, mustard,” said colleague Jill Jurgensson, admitting that, while eating it every day must get tiresome, the lunch itself is not inherently bad. “See, I can name you every ingredient off the top of my head. That’s what we’re dealing with here. Some days he doesn’t come in with a bag, and I assume he’s going to go out for lunch. I get so excited for him. But then he always runs out to his car on his break and gets the sandwich. Then he eats it at his desk while watching NBA highlights.” The report concluded by asserting that Greg probably has like six things in his refrigerator at home.

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