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The Brown Noser

Report: Hell Yeah, Ex Getting Uglier

Published Friday, October 29th, 2021

Overcome with a wave of self-assuredness following a glance at her ex’s new profile picture, area woman Janelle Krupcik reported that, hell yeah, he’s getting uglier. “Oh… this rocks,” Krupcik said, grinning as she noted that her ex’s physical appearance has steadily declined since the day they broke up, his hairline receding at the age of 24, his face becoming notably less chiseled, and his personal style taking a turn for the worse. “He’s getting grosser by the day! Fuck yes.” At press time, Krupcik realized that, oh shit, she’s also getting uglier.

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