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During the Premier League playoff game between Manchester United and Liverpool FC, one player received a historic yellow-green card for slightly bad behavior during the first half.
“At first, I wasn’t sure how to handle the situation,” said professional-league referee Brian Poland, holding the rare card aloft for the cameras, the beautiful vibrancy of chartreuse striking awe and fear into fans of both teams. “In all my 47 years of refereeing, I’ve never seen a soccer player chase around the opposing team with a booger and yell, ‘Nyeehhhhh, nyehh!’ I don’t—like—they weren’t touching him, right? So it wasn’t a foul. But clearly he was being a mean little bully boy, and I can’t have that either. So I eventually made the decision to pull out a card which is reserved for behavior that is sort of bad but not quite bad enough for a yellow.”
“We train for every possible scenario during our 12-year intensive refereeing program, but I couldn’t have anticipated this,” continued Poland as the offending player sadly kicked his feet around on the sidelines and just sort of moped. “The chartreuse card signifies that during halftime, the player must give a very nice heartfelt apology to the opposing team. And it has to be heartfelt, or that’s another chartreuse card right there. I understand that my fellow referees are going to be criticizing my decision on the field today, but I’m confident that ultimately, this card was the right call.”
In the second half, the same player received a vermillion-orange card for pantsing the referee.
