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This past Sunday, the suspicious marionette man Zepetto was seen offering a deal with “no strings attached.”
“Yeah, it was really suspicious,” said Alex Silva, a student who encountered Zepetto in his creepy alley. “I asked him what his deal was, and he just told me I could gain infinite wisdom in exchange for just a moment of my time—no strings attached. Yeah…I didn’t really buy that.”
“He saw that I didn’t believe him, so he tried offering me another deal where I’d receive all earthly and heavenly treasures—again, strings detached and all,” continued Silva, noting that the strings-attached nature of Zepetto caused him to doubt the legitimacy of this deal. “Then he handed me a big treasure chest that had a bunch of strings attached to it. That was the final straw for me. I just ran away as fast as I could and never looked back.”
At press time, Janbibo the Sock Puppet Man planned to make a deal with Zepetto but reportedly got cold feet.
