Sunday, September 25, 2022
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The Brown Noser

Tank In Dentist Office Lobby Officially Most Habitable Place On Earth For Tropical Fish

Published Friday, September 16th, 2022

Biology Research Institute, due to climate change-related habitat loss, the fish tank in the lobby of SmileBrite pediatric dentist’s office in Worcester, Massachusetts is officially the most habitable environment on Earth for tropical fish. “We have looked at the data relating to water pollution, ocean acidification, and oil particles per million and have concluded that the fish tank in SmileBrite’s office, though small, is the best place on Earth to be a tropical fish,” said oceanographer Katrina Graff, petitioning the UN to designate SmileBrite’s lobby as a nature reserve. “Though the fish are enclosed in glass and fed with flakes from a little bottle, this tank is a more accurate representation of the habitat in which tropical fish evolved than the actual oceans are today. We must do what we can to preserve this natural wonder.” Shifting to a different marine habitat, Graff confirmed that the most habitable environment for freshwater turtles is the tank in the bedroom of Ontario fourth-grader Mikey Garnet.

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