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Tour guide Steven Yule is reportedly just lying. Yule, who has been a tour guide for the past two years, has never shared accurate information about Brown’s campus with his respective tour groups.
“The food here is like what your grandma makes,” he consciously fibbed as he passed the Ratty, basking in the glory of overeager nods from the group of emotionally vulnerable high school juniors. “There’s never a line, and it’s honestly like eating a home cooked meal every night.”
As Yule discussed the character of Brown’s student body, he sat down on a bench to appear pensive. He considered tearing up as he described Brown students’ warmth and strength of character, but he ultimately decided that might be a little much.
“The students at Brown care about learning for the sake of learning,” Yule said, internally cackling at the ease with which he could manipulate the group of insecure teenagers and their parents. “Honestly, no one here even talks about grades — just about how interested they are in their classes, and how curious they are about the world at large. Every single person is so incredibly passionate, talented, and laid back, it doesn’t feel real.”
At the end of the tour, Yule, with superficial humility, played along when someone he vaguely knew shouted “Happy birthday!” even though his birthday was two months ago.
