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The Brown Noser

Trump Assures Worried Americans He'll Be Fine

Published Friday, April 24th, 2020

In his daily press conference Tuesday, President Trump assured a worried nation that no matter how severe the COVID-19 pandemic gets, he’ll be fine.

“I know everybody’s very worried about the coronavirus,” Trump said, striking a comforting tone to address the fears of the millions of Americans tuning in. “But I want everybody to rest easy knowing that I’m gonna get through this. This won’t be the end of my presidency.”

Speaking directly to the camera, the president regretfully acknowledged that the pandemic has taken the lives of tens of thousands of Americans and upended the lives of countless others. But he emphasized that nothing — not even the single most daunting crisis the country has ever faced — can truly knock him down.

“The country may be shut down, and we may be facing some very tough times,” Trump continued, building up to a strident message to raise the spirits of all Americans. “But you know what? No matter what happens, I’ll still be the president. And I’m gonna be even stronger when this is all done.”

Trump concluded his speech by calling on all Americans to do everything necessary to protect him from the harmful effects of the pandemic.

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