Partly Cloudy, 64°
It was revealed earlier this week that your lab partner for the remainder of the semester will be that kid you've avoided since the first week of class when he saw you picking your nose in the Frisc.
In previous attempts to rationalize the incident, you have reminded yourself that you weren't really picking, but rather scratching an itch on the inside of your left nostril. The male student (who you have since deduced is named Johan Mars '13, but you're not totally sure. whatever) raised an eyebrow at you as he passed through the 25-decibel zone.
You realized days later in your Chem 33 lecture that Mars (or whoever this guy is) was enrolled in the same course. Glaring at the back of his head with a rage fueled by embarrassment, you became flustered when he turned around and dove into your backpack, muttering loudly about needing a pencil with a more intact eraser.
Since then you have harbored an intense resentment toward Mars and now glower at his dumb judgmental face when you pass him in the mailroom or the Ratty. He probably glares back, though you view him only as an amorphous scapegoat on whom you may project displaced anger with no fear of confrontation.
You also met Mars through friends at two separate parties and got along fine, but have chosen on both occasions to pretend that you were too drunk to remember each other in the light of day. In the past month, likely due to the added pressure of midterms, you have begun crossing your eyes and sticking out your tongue when you see him.
Unfortunately, this comfortable relationship of idle hatred underwent a change on Wednesday morning when Professor Nell Sugarburg read off the new list of lab partners. At 2 p.m. this afternoon, you will be expected to work with Mars to do something really awful, like bend photons around covalent electron bonds of atomic mass number valences in agar gel.
Needless to say, you have contemplated pulling a fire alarm, wearing full-face safety goggles so he doesn't recognize you, or abandoning your hopes of medical school and dropping the course. You expect that the level of awkwardness will approximate that time you really needed a laundry machine and one of the machines was done so you took the clothes out and piled them on top of the machine. But then some girl came in and saw you touching her thongs, and later she turned out to be your friend's new girlfriend and you had to go to the Gate with them because you'd already promised him you would.
When the Noser asked Mars about the new lab partnership and showed him a picture of you, he replied that he had never seen you before in his life.
