Although they all have stuff to do tomorrow and are totally going to kick themselves for it later, employees of Loui's Family Restaurant on Brook Street decided at 1 a.m last night to hang out in the store until the morning and then serve people some food.
"Guys, I know we're all really tired and all," owner Brent Auben said as the staff finished their second game of Apples to Apples, "but wouldn't it be ridiculous if we just stayed up all night and did Loui's in the morning?"
Support for the proposal was initially lukewarm as the group debated whether they could possibly remain awake that long. Auben insisted that they could.
"Come on, guys, it'll be fun. We'll get to see the sun rise. And this restaurant is our only source of income."
Auben explained that the decision they faced was a microcosm of the diner's 63-year history, which started when Louis Gianfrancesco and his friends were really tired one night and didn't know whether to go to sleep or found a restaurant that would define the rest of their lives.
"Gianfrancesco faced a dilemma," said Auben, looking meaningfully into his friends' eyes "The night was no longer young and he certainly wasn't going to get any, but he was drunk and looking for something to do. The answer, then and forever since, has always been the same: Loui's."
Over the years, Loui's has established itself as a fallback option for countless members of the Brown community and the world at large.
Theoretical physicist Albert Einstein was no stranger to the aromas of the beloved diner, and when he became frustrated near the end of his career with his failure at formulating a unified field theory, Einstein eventually decided to call it quits and go to Loui's.
Richard Nixon's 1968 presidential campaign centered on a promise of "peace with honor" as he promised U.S. troops would withdraw from Vietnam and head to Loui's for a delicious meal.
Under dry conditions, plants are known to switch from C3 photosynthesis to the water-conserving C4 pathway. But exciting research from the lab of Assistant Professor of Biology Antonio Matzuzzi suggests that when a lack of ATP precludes the C4 pathway, the plants resort to the Loui's pathway, in which they go to Loui's.
After the New York Giants defeated the Denver Broncos to win Super Bowl XXI, Giants quarterback Phil Simms famously became the first to declare to the camera that he was going to Disneyworld. John Elway, the losing quarterback, less famously announced that the Broncos would be "going to Loui's, I suppose."
And last night, after a long period of time during which the group could not decide whether or not to just say 'fuck it' and stay up until the morning, the group finally decided to just say 'fuck it' and stay up until the morning.
"Okay, but this is the last time I'm doing this," said owner Johnny Gianfrancesco, reluctantly accepting the same suggestion he has reluctantly accepted every night for more than twenty years.